Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
