It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
