I bet he comes in French.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
