i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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