thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize