Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
