He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
