Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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