My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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