evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
