You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
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