Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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