I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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