Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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