is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
