exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
