i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I love you.
Bad choice
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
