yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
