Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
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