my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
