Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
