Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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