is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
