I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
