just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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