y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
