giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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