eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
