And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
