guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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