Fuck appropriateness.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Randomize
