YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
