There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
