I'm gonna have a badass scar
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
