Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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