So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
