Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
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