I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize