I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
