did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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