I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
