this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
