My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
You can't special order awesome
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
