So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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