So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
