so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
