3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
