and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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