I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
that's an acceptable place to lick
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
