we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
