Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
